How to Enjoy Perfect Peace No Matter Your Circumstances

Another fantastic Real Life with Lisa video!  What a timely blessing this was in our family!  I hope it will be to some of you also.  All too often life gets chaotic and full of busyness and just anything and everything that feels like anything but peace.  But Mrs. Jacobson reminds us that we can ALWAYS have peace and that it's not really about what's going on AROUND us at all, but it's what's going on INSIDE of us that makes whether we have peace or not.  I hope you'll be blessed!
Just a note, Lisa Jacobson from club31women.com, is posting a weekly on Wednesday video series called Real Life with Lisa.  This is the third video she's done.  We've greatly enjoyed each one already. 
~Breanna

http://club31women.com/enjoy-perfect-peace/

Hope

My precious daughters sent this message of encouragement to me this morning.  How blessed I am!  I am so hopeful, as it was such an encouragement to me, that it might be also be to someone else out there.  ~Karen

Modesty and Obedience Collide!!

Here is someone that is seeking to light her world!  Posted on one of our favorite sites www.club31women.com

(Little disclaimer:  We probably would not agree with everything Ms. Jasmine deems as modest, but I was so blessed by her heart and desire to obey the Lord. She is obviously much more modest than she use to be.  We are all a work in progress!  Her heart and each of our hearts to obey is the key thing!)

The Day My Love for Fashion Collided with God’s Call to Modesty

It all started in the spring of 2014.

I had recently rededicated myself to Christ and was committed to living a life fully submitted to Him.

One afternoon I was rummaging through my closet in search of something to wear. I reached for one of my cropped tops when God spoke a word to me, that at the time, I’d rather have not heard.

As clear as day, God said, “Throw your revealing clothes away.”    

Out of my commitment to being obedient, I grabbed a trash bag, and less than willingly began to remove every questionable piece of clothing from my wardrobe. I tried negotiating with God to keep my short shorts, but He just wasn’t having it. 

Shortly after this incident, God spoke another word to me.

A little back story – I had worked in the fashion industry for about five years at this point and held a managerial position at a rapidly growing company. I had the opportunity to travel all over the world and work in places like Paris, London, and New York.  

I had always dreamed of starting my own business within the industry; however, my ideas didn’t necessarily do anything positive for the Kingdom. The concept promoted an edgy, rebellious attitude, encouraging women to show more skin in the name of “empowerment.” 

But God – being the humorous God that He is – completely shifted my desires and pressed on my heart that He wanted me to start a modest clothing company. 

When I thought of modest clothing companies, the image that immediately came to mind was layers and layers of fabric draped in very unflattering ways. I wouldn’t necessarily pair the words “modest clothing company” and “fashionable” together.

But maybe that’s why God gave me this vision. Could it be that He saw a niche in the market that He needed me to fulfill?

Soon I began to realize that His plan was deeper than just the fashion, He had a message. 

See, all my life I was taught by culture and the media that revealing more of my body would make me feel beautiful, confident, and get me the man of my dreams. 

Oh, the lies the enemy would love us to believe!

Dressing the way that I did only resulted in getting me the wrong kind of attention, and it hindered me from possessing the true confidence that can only be found in Christ.

The scary thing is that I know I’m not the only woman being fed this lie. The culture is becoming more and more hypersexualized by the second, and with the increasing popularity of social media, the “sex sells” image is constantly being pushed in our faces.

I want to reinvent the way the world thinks about modesty. 

I want to inspire this generation of women not to conform to what the world defines as “cool”, but to realize that there is nothing more liberating than unapologetically living to glorify God in every aspect of our lives, including our clothing.

In the fall of 2015, by faith, and with the help of the unarguable nudging of the Holy Spirit,I left my job in the secular fashion industry and have been hard at work turning my passion into purpose with Gracemade, a faith-driven lifestyle brand where faith and fashion coexist. 

Gracemade: Reinventing modesty

My vision is to provide a fashion-forward alternative to dowdy modest apparel and to show women that they can still express their personal style while honoring their faith.

It’s not only a clothing line; it’s also a community.

A community that empowers women to be all that God has created them to be. 

Jasmine Rennie is the founder of faith-driven fashion startup, Gracemade. She has a passion for inspiring women to fulfill their God-given purpose, and to live boldly and fearlessly in faith. Jasmine is based in Southern California and is obsessed with Jesus, design, and all things food related. 

How to build up your home and family...one word at a time

Another timely and powerful encouragement from Lisa Jacobson at club31women.com!  The power of our words...this one so hits me!  I frequently stand amazed at how much effect our words have, for the better and for the worse.

 I'm sure many of you have heard this saying, but this is a favorite one in our home, especially with such a cute little rabbit as Thumper saying it. :-)...

 

It also reminds me of the prayer in Psalms 19:14

Also the prayer in Psalm 141:3

Oh that the words that proceed out of my mouth would be that which is good to the use of edifying, that it would minister grace unto the hearers! (Eph. 4:29)  I know this is the desire of all of our hearts.  May the Lord help us to set a watch over this unruly member of ours (James 3:8) that our homes, families, churches, etc. would be built up...one word at a time.  It starts today.  Each word that comes out of our mouths is an opportunity to build up or tear down. What a challenge to take into each day!



Okay...on to the article! :-)
~Breanna

How to Build Up Your Marriage, Child, and Home . . . One Word at a Time

You wouldn’t think a word could make such a difference.
But it does.
On some days, all the difference in the world.
The difference between tears or a smile.
Between slumped shoulders or a hug.
Between healing or hurt.
Between building up or tearing down.

Funny, how only a few words can turn around an entire day. Even turn around an entire heart.
I know. Because I’ve seen it happen right before my eyes.

I’ve heard my husband say to our youngest son, “I like the way God made you!” and watch that boy stand that much taller.

Then not too long ago, I told that same Man, “You are such a good daddy to our boys!” Something I figured he knew. But he almost seemed surprised to hear it. Like it was a new revelation. I guess it’s one of those things I’ve thought for a long time, but never got around to saying. Until last week.

And you could tell it meant the world for him to hear it. Coming from me. Maybe especially coming from me.

But then it was my turn to be on the receiving end.
And that really did it.

It was a weekday and I was dashing between the laundry room and the kitchen. Chopping vegetables, then sorting dirty clothes. Slicing sausage, then changing out loads of laundry. Stirring the soup, then folding clean clothes.
Back and forth. Back and forth.
He was working on his computer downstairs, but watched me from his chair.
Even in my hurry, I could feel his eyes on me.

Then I heard him say it.
He simply said, “You are amazing.” Followed by, “Do you know how amazing you are?”

And I answered him honestly, “No, Honey. I don’t feel very amazing at all.”
“But you are.” Then he went on to list out a bunch of things that he appreciated about me and, quite frankly, several things I had no idea he’d even noticed.

And I smiled.
And I hugged.
And I stood that much taller.

So yeah, our words matter. Because a kind and loving word can make all the difference in the world.
At least they do in our little world around here.

So we’re working on building up our home, one word at a time. 

Lisa Jacobson

Communication...

Good old communication.  :-) Seems to be a key in any relationship.  It's an often talked about topic.  But that doesn't mean that it always comes naturally or that it is the easiest.  I read these two articles on communication on a favorite blog of mine, Club31Women.  I thought I would share them with you all for food for thought.  :-)
~Breanna


“Something’s wrong,”  my husband said. 
How does he do that, I wondered.
My husband can take one look at me or catch a certain tone in my voice and he knows something is troubling me.
After 14 years of marriage, we communicate very well — without words.
“Yes,” I answered with a smile. “There is something wrong, but I don’t want to bring you into it.”
“What? Why not?” He asked with complete surprise.
I struggled to find the right words to express to him that sometimes I’m not sure if telling my troubles to my husband is the best thing — even those personal struggles with feeling pretty or good enough for him.
But, I knew he was right.
There really wasn’t any reason to keep things from my husband. We are one flesh, aren’t we? We are traveling this road called together, aren’t we?
After a few moments of silence, I let him in on my troubles; troubles, that to some, seem small and insignificant, but to my husband, they weren’t.
Why? Because they were my troubles and he wanted to work through them with me.
My husband and I have faced some rocky roads together. Sometimes it was his personal trials, sometimes it was mine. There were other times when our entire family was suffering and we needed to communicate with each other.
We need to bear each other’s burdens. In fact, God commands it.

Bear ye one another’s burdens, and so fulfil the law of Christ. Galations 6:2

Enjoying A Deep, Strong Marriage

Keeping the lines of communication open, honest, and yet loving has helped my husband and I enjoy a deep, strong marriage. It’s not just infatuation or puppy love. but, it’s a marriage based on God’s word and communication.
In fact, communicating and working through our difficulties together has made us a stronger team.
Many times I see a pattern in our marriage. Typically, when I am down, he is up, and when he is down, I am up. There always seemed to be at least one of us that can offer some encouragement and comfort. I am so glad I do not have to travel this journey alone for now. I have a husband, that when I communicate my innermost sorrows, he is there to lift me up.

Two are better than one; because they have a good reward for their labour. For if they fall, the one will lift up his fellow: but woe to him that is alone when he falleth; for he hath not another to help him up. Ecc.4:9-10

Though communication is vital in a marriage, there are times when silence is best — particularly when our tongue desires to criticize or tear down our husbands.
Yes, it’s best not to communicate in those times, but rather pray.
Our tongues will only worsen the situation. When our hearts are full of love and kindness, then we can seek to encourage our husbands.
In recent days, I have had a lot of drama and emotional situations come my way. I have been so thankful that I had a caring person to listen, arms to hold and comfort me and a spiritual leader to direct my footsteps.
Do you ever have those days where it seems a small part of your world gets turned upside down?
Don’t hide those situations from your husband. Let him in to your world. Let him have those hidden pieces of your heart.
As I look back over the past 14 years of my marriage, I am so thankful that I have kept the lines of communication open with my husband. Instead of telling a girlfriend or my mom, there were many times when I only told two people — God and my husband.
If the lines of communication in your marriage are down, try opening them back up by letting your husband be “in the know” with struggles, victories and issues that are present in your life.
Keeping them from him will only push him away.
You may be surprised at the relief, support and close-knit relationship you’ll enjoy from communicating!
 ~Alison Wood

 

 Have you ever found yourself feeling:

“I’m just so mad, so hurt—again. I’m not going to share my heart with him anymore. He doesn’t understand. It is too painful. We’ll live in the same house but he can do his thing and I’ll do mine.” 

Most of us, if we are really honest, have felt this way about our husband from time to time.

I call it falling into the trap of emotional divorce.

Imagine a solid glass patio door.

Emotional divorce is a bit like slamming that patio door shut on our hearts.

We still see the person on the other side, but there’s a strong, sealed panel between us.

We begin to close up our heart to him.

This trap can occur during stressful transitions in our lives-a move, a job loss, financial pressures, a new baby, caring for elderly parents, a child in crisis, etc. We are stressed and if each of us responds differently to the issue, we get irritated.

We are too exhausted to communicate.

We are afraid, and we unintentionally take it out on one another.

What do we do when we find ourselves falling into this trap?

1. Recognize what is happening and refuse to let that “patio door” separate you.

2. Make the decision to take a sledgehammer and begin to chip away at that glass wall. Thick patio doors don’t usually splinter into pieces all at once. It takes a steady chipping away at a tiny crack until the door dissolves.

3. Talk to a godly older couple and ask for their help. Most churches have older couples who would be happy to mentor you, pray for you, and encourage you. Get counseling as needed.
4. Remember God is for your marriage. He is the strong “super glue” holding you together. You can rely on Him. He will bring you through this time and your marriage will be deeper and stronger as a result.

“For nothing is impossible for God.” (Luke 1:37)

Blessings,

~Susan Yates

An Uncommon Love: Lisa and Matthew Jacobson's love story- a story of encouragement and the faithfulness of God

I don't know about you, but I love reading stories about how God miraculously brings two unique people together as one in marriage.  Because really, it truly is a miracle.  I was...well, let's just say more than a little excited when two of my favorite blog writers announced that they were going to be sharing their love story!  Yay!  Well, the anticipation has been tortuous waiting each week as they post another piece to their story each Wednesday, going back and forth between them, bringing their readers along for the ride as they share what they were thinking, learning, and going through with God directing each step in amazing ways to bring them together.  Truly a precious and amazing story!  I have been so blessed by reading their blogs and it is sooo obvious that they are still in love with each other after all these years!  They were both a little older when they married, a testimony to us young people to wait on God for His best!  It's worth waiting for, as Matthew and Lisa Jacobson so beautifully describe in their story.  God works in amazing ways!  So, without further introduction...below is the introduction to their story and the links to the first 7 chapters and I'm joining you in on the anticipation of waiting for chapter 8 to be posted on Wednesday!  :-)  Hope you enjoy! ~Breanna

An Uncommon Love: How We Met and Decided to Marry in Six Days

Matthew and I have shared our story many times over the years.  

Late into the evening with old friends. Over a cup of coffee with new friends.  At a Valentine’s Banquet. With singles who needed encouragement. With couples who could use a good laugh. And with our son’s college friends across the country.

We always tell our story together—him and me.

I think it’s mostly because he doesn’t really tell it right. He gets people to take his side in the story, but that’s just not fair. So I have to get my word in there too (and I’m already counting on you to take my part in this, okay?). I wouldn’t want you to get the wrong impression!

Maybe it’s not all that unusual of a story.

Single girl meets single guy.
Starts with a letter.
Ends with a kiss.
Just another love story.
Except maybe for the part where we decided to marry six days after we met.
And that we’ve been loving each other ever since.
Maybe that’s not quite so typical.
Uncommon. 

An Uncommon Love.

Yeah, that’s what he called it. And I always liked the way that sounded.  So that’s what I’ve called it too.
And that’s the story we’re going to be sharing over the next few weeks.  Him and me.

About how we knew we wanted to get married only six days after our first date.

And how before that, I declared that I wouldn’t go out with him “If he was the last man on earth”. Yet somehow ended up in his arms in the end.

It’s a  story about an ordinary guy and an ordinary girl.  A story about falling in love.
About insecurities, miscommunications, self-doubts, wonder and a kiss.
Two people looking for love and waiting on God.
In true life.

 

*Chapter One: If He Was the Last Man On Earth

*Chapter Two: Where Is She? Searching for My Forever Girl

*Chapter Three: What Happens When Mr. Right Walks Into the Room

*Chapter Four: What A Smile Can Say to Him

*Chapter Five: The Best Answer If You’re Ever Invited on An Adventure

*Chapter Six: The Night I Fell In Love

*Chapter Seven: 1,000 Ways to Win Her Heart

5 Good Reasons Why Cleaning (yes, cleaning) Actually Matters

Wow, what a great reminder shared on Club 31 Women website!  Keep up the good work ladies...your daily endeavors count for eternity and DO make a difference!

~Breanna

My hands were black with dirt as I came in from the garage, and I headed straight for the shower, after telling my son I was sure there were 10 spiders in my hair. 

Perhaps an exaggeration, but I couldn’t help but have the creepy-crawlies after sweeping that many spider webs out of the corners.

The garage had been driving me crazy for months, so I tackled it. In several hours of hard work, I had the freezer defrosted, a huge mound of stuff taken to the church garage sale, shelves tidied, and floor swept.
As I swept the last pile of dirt into the dustpan, my thoughts went to the comments of two women I had heard from the day before.

One was a young mom almost despairing of what possible good purpose wiping snotty noses and mopping the floor could be doing in this dark world.

One was an empty nest mom who was struggling to find the why in doing housework without the children around.

I had been trying to find ways to encourage these two friends but was having trouble.
Why clean?

Why toilets and sweeping and laundry and dishes –the same day after day?

Looking around at my now gloriously clean garage, I thought of the expression, Cleanliness is next to godliness, but this time I gave it serious consideration.

Is cleanliness next to godliness? If so, why?

Will you allow me to entertain a yes to that question and throw out some reasons why the job of keeping things clean is a holy activity?

Five Reasons Why Cleaning Matters:

1.     The good news of Christ is that the dirty can be made spotless. The black-as-night heart can be made white as snow. Every time we clean our homes we show ourselves and our families and every guest that redemption is a possibility.
2.     The good news of Christ is that chaos can be brought into order. Our lives were a disaster until Christ came in and swept out the corners and sets things right. Every time we neatly put things away in a cupboard or fold a towel with corners matching we mimic what God can do in the human heart.
3.     The good news of Christ is that we are invited into the kingdom of light. Every time we dust an end table we admit that light reveals everything. Every time we clean a window we express an awareness of the goodness and warmth that light brings.
4.     The good news of Christ is that he came to serve us, to give us life. Every time we clean we serve those who enter our homes. We demonstrate how important they are to us.
5.     The good news of Christ is that our troubled hearts can find peace in him. Every time we clean we create an environment of comfort and peacefulness, a refuge from a messy world. We say, as Christ did to us, Come. Rest.


Keeping a shiny home is mundane work that seldom receives accolades, but it is important for more than just meeting health department standards or for gaining your mamma’s approval.
A clean house preaches a sermon of hope.

So grab a broom, sister. It matters.

As for me, I have a smelly toilet ring to tackle.

 Christy Fitzwater

What My Husband Needs

Inspired by a series that Matthew and Lisa Jacobson are doing on marriage over Club31Woman.com here is my newest poster that I am seeking to keep before my eyes and applying to my life.

What My Husband Needs

Trust him.  Somehow a man instinctively knows if you believe in him–or not. For instance, how you respond to his decision-making speaks powerfully to him. Is your first response to question him? Challenge him? Or do you save that “coupon” carefully? He needs you to trust him and his final decisions.
Admire him. He’d like to know that you are his biggest fan – hands down! No one should admire him more than you do. My personal goal? I never want anyone who works with my man to think more highly of him than I do. I want him both to see it in my eyes and to hear it from my mouth.
Be loyal to him. Fiercely loyal. You’ve got his back and he knows it. Your children should know it too. In fact, there should be no doubt in anyone’s mind where your loyalty lies. No one would dare say anything disparaging about your man in front of you because that is simply not done.
Honor him. Both in private and in public. So that he doesn’t have to concerned about what you might say to him or how you’ll represent him in front of others.  You never want to demean him or bring him down a notch. Quite the opposite. He can even be confident that you’ll respect his wishes when he’s not around—your regard for him goes that deep.

Thoughts on Modesty and Beauty ~ from TimeWarpWife and Club31Women

 A good article on modesty.  Though this is coming from the angle of girls not realizing what they're doing, I think a lot of girls are probably fully aware of the consequences of their actions.  We must seek to show genuine love to our brothers in Christ by aiding them in their pursuit of purity.

If She Only Knew - Thoughts on Modesty and Beauty

Posted: 25 Jun 2013 11:11 PM PDT

Guest contributor Lisa Jacobson from Club31Women

Avert your eyes, Son.

His dad started saying it to him from the youngest age - when he was only a little boy. Might have been an alluring commercial while watching the ballgame. Or a billboard while driving down the highway. A pop-up on the computer screen.

As parents, we had purposed to teach him purity from the beginning.

And you wouldn't think that would be too tough to do where we live. We're out in the country, somewhere on the outskirts of a small western town. But that hardly matters anymore.

Temptation can be found anywhere.

Even in Target.

Target? Yeah, I know. That's what I thought too. Until one day we popped in to pick up some flip-flops for the summer and I remarked how he kept bumping into things.

What is your problem, Son??

"I'm just looking down, Mom," And with a nod, he indicated the ads placed strategically above us. Billboards for the lingerie department. Yikes. I'd not seen them.

But then again...I'm not a vulnerable young man either.

Sorry, Son.

I'm sorry the Enemy tries to pull you down everywhere you turn. I feel badly we live in a world that's so ready to compromise a man's commitment to clean living. It's never been easy - only it's far worse now.

Is there nowhere a young man can safely go?

Maybe a Christian family camp. You'd think.

It was a hot July day and we all packed up and headed out for fun and fellowship with a bunch of other believers. Picnic blankets, cold watermelon, and squirt guns. It was promising to be a great day.

So I was surprised to see our oldest son hanging back from the festivities. He's an outgoing guy and usually one of the first out there mixing it up. Except not this time. He stayed close to our small spot and played with his little brothers instead.

What is your problem, Son??

He hesitated for a moment. Then answered, "Mom, I don't know what to do. Dad's taught me to 'avert my eyes', but there doesn't seem anywhere I can turn here."

I glanced around and then saw what he meant.

Most of the ladies there were dressed for a hot summer day. Many with bare skin exposed. Lots of bareness. Yikes, again. Who would have thought he'd have to wrestle with it here?

I noticed a pretty girl nearby and wondered if she realized how difficult she was making it for a guy. Surely, she would have made another choice if she had. She might have thrown a light blouse on over her tank top. Slipped on a longer, breezy skirt. Picked out some walking shorts or a shirt with a higher neckline. She might have covered herself up.

If she only understood how hard he's trying to do the right thing. She might have dressed differently. For his sake. For the sake of all the men out there who want to walk in purity.

If she only knew that the way she dressed up meant a good man needed to look down. He had to turn away from her beauty. That he was missing out on her loveliness because she was showing him more than he was meant to see.

Because we can teach our sons to avert their eyes. To lower their gaze. But what can we do as Christian women? We can't leave our guys stuck in a place where there's nowhere left to turn.

Let's choose modesty - modesty that allows a woman's true beauty to shine through.

In like matter also, that the women adorn themselves in modest apparel, with propriety and moderation (I Tim. 2:9a).

In His grace,

Confessions of a Yelling Mom (now reformed)

What an encouragement and challenge this post by Lisa Jacobson from Club31Women blog was to me! Very convicting, but also encouraging.  I hope you will be blessed by reading it.

 

Nobody would have pegged me for a yeller.

Actually, I wouldn’t have guessed it either. Maybe my memory is faulty, but I don’t remember ever having shouted before – except maybe at a college football game or catching a friend’s attention across the parking lot.

Other than that, I’d say I’m a fairly soft-spoken person.

But something seemed to have happened once I had small children. Yeah, it’s like something snapped!

I became a yeller.

A yeller? Me??

At first I blamed it on all kinds of things. Hormones. Stress. Sleep-deprivation. But after a while, I had to face up to the facts. No matter what the cause, I’d turned into a yelling mom.

And I hated it and wanted to change.

I cried out to God to miraculously overcome this awful struggle, secretly hoping for some kind of instantaneous healing. But it turned out to be more of a journey – by His grace, in His strength, and with a lot of determined effort on my part.

One of the first steps of my journey was to start an anger journal. I wrote down each time I lost my cool. I recorded the time of the day, the setting, the person, and the circumstance – much like you would in a food journal. Then I looked for patterns. When did I most often lose it? Under what conditions?

I tried to identify the specific situations I could do something about. For instance, I often unraveled in the late morning and much of it was due to being HUNGRY. A mid-morning snack went a long way toward that trouble. Also, I found that taking a short nap after lunch helped me better handle our afternoons. Setting up a basic routine with our young ones reduced the general chaos which made it a bit easier on my nerves too.

Now those were some problems I could address. But what about those things that I couldn’t control or anticipate? Spilled cereal bowls. Poopy diapers. Arguing children. Seemingly incessant demands on my time and body all day long. Yes, what about those?

Next step….

Unknowingly, I’d always orchestrated my life around what I wanted out of the day. As a single woman, I’d set out goals for myself and then I accomplished them. But my life changed dramatically when I had children. It was no longer all about me and what I thought a day should look like.
So a change was needed – a change in my perspective. It wasn’t merely about what I wanted anymore. My goals. My purposes. My life.

My question needed to be, “Lord, what do You have for us today?”

What if He wanted me to learn “serving” by cleaning up one spill after another that morning? Then I could view the disaster as more of “an opportunity” than a “trial”.

What if our children ruined our trip to the library because of all their bickering? Hmm…looks like The Lord wants us to learn more about loving each other than about reptiles and kangaroos.

When I began looking at our day in this light, that “snappish” feeling wasn’t nearly so strong. And, even if it was one of those terribly trying times, I could ask, “Please, Lord, help me to see what You want for us here?”

While this was a slow, and sometimes painful, process, I eventually got better. Quieter and calmer. Peaceful.

And if you happen to be on just such a journey? Here’s what I’d say:

• Don’t listen to the Enemy that you can’t change. Because you can.

• Don’t be overly hard on yourself if you mess up. Simply start anew the next day. Or  even the very next moment. (On occasion, I’d stop mid-yell…then say aloud, “Nope. I want to try that again.”)

• Don’t attempt to overcome this in your own strength. Rather in Christ (Phil. 4:13).

• Do ask for support and prayer from people who love you. While rather humbling, I’m thankful for a couple of close friends and a husband who stood with me on this one.

So, yes, by God’s grace I’m no longer a yeller.

Well, unless my kids do something really wonderful, that is. Then you’ll hear me shouting as loudly as the next mom.

Yelling and cheering.

And I’ll be cheering for you too.

In His Grace,
Lisa Jacobson

~Posted By Breanna