Wonderful little reminder! Whether you're married or not, this applies in any relationship.
"Charity...seeketh not her own..."
That sounded like a great idea, she thought. It would be so perfect–like a whammy he’d never expect. She’d lull him into believing everything was alright, and then she’d leave. It would be so devastating, like an extra punishment.
So she did it. She was sweet. She was affectionate. She brought him coffee.
And when 30 days was up, she went to see the counselor. He asked if she was ready to tell him, and she said, “No way! A funny thing happened this month. I think I fell in love with him again!”
As she was nice to him, he was nice to her. And they found a new balance in their marriage that was actually quite fun. But it happened because she started ACTING love out, not because she started FEELING.
Our feelings normally follow our actions, not the other way around. Try acting out love, and you may find that your heart softens.